Talise

Age: 29

Hometown: New Orleans, LA

Get Real with us.

The basics. I am a cosmetologist and have had my license for nearly 10 years. Hair is my passion and I can’t see myself not doing it. I like to make collages. I have a wall-sized collage on my wall that I continuously add to. I also write poetry - mostly about me and my feelings. I like to take my words and make you see what I see through my eyes. I am a fan of books. I love to read - mostly about the paranormal, hauntings, and ghost stories. I also like to participate in the King Shows, either by myself or with a drag king. It’s fun. I am a pretty open-minded person. I am honest, and I am blunt. I cannot stand cowards and anyone who is judgmental and refuses to give someone the time of day because they think they are “better.”

My story. I believe that there is only one thing stopping me from truly being myself - family. Right now I am living a double life. In May of this year I finally “came out” to my family and told them I was a lesbian. I love my family so much I would die for them. It just really hurts me because all my life I have dealt with bullies and basically being picked on. I am a lot older now and know what I want, and I know that what I feel is REAL. I know who I am and when I came out to them it hurt, especially to see them cry, but at the same time I felt relief and I felt happy. My family asked me not to tell anyone in the family until we came back from vacation, they needed time to accept it and let it sink in. I have respect for them, and I am not the type of person that feels I need to run in a room and proclaim my gayness. But I don’t believe in lying either. I would rather keep it to myself, until asked.

After my vacation with my family, we came back and a few days later I woke up to my mother shouting at me - just out of the blue - to leave. She said she gave birth to me and did not give birth to a lesbian and that I was straight. That I was too “pretty” to be gay. So with that I left and stayed with very good friends of mine who had both already been in my shoes and worse. I stayed with them, and then a friend offered a room with my own bathroom and a little more privacy, so I went there for a month. When that roommate came home one night we had a spat and she really hurt my feelings. It was that night that I realized I couldn’t make it on my own. My career was not working - no clients, no money. I had nowhere to go so I did what a scared lonely teenager on the streets would do… I called home. My mother came and got me and I was moved out within two hours. The ONLY way I could go home was to stop going to the lesbian bar, to get “straight,” and live a “normal” life. I agreed, not that I can force myself to be straight, and I went home.

At this point in time, I am still living my double life. I don’t know what I am going to do when that point in time comes when I am ready to get married and have a family, when I am in a relationship with a wonderful partner. How is my family going to react? I don’t want be the cause of a heart attack. I don’t want to lose my family. I don’t want to be looked down on.

I now have a better job, so I am trying to save money to move out, although I don’t think I can take living here another year - or two. I’d be 33 - I am too old for this. I only wish they would be more open-minded, like me, and then I could be relieved and happy again - and truly be REAL.

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